Mother of Boys

I am the proud mother of two boys aged 3 and 7. I am too old for more kids. I just don’t have the energy. This means, I will never have a daughter and it is something that makes me truly sad. I see the glittery, sparkly pink worlds of braiding hair and painting nails that my friends with tu-tu-wearing daughters live in and sigh. I will not have that.

That said, I do enjoy my boys. I grew up with two brothers and in many ways, my mental set-up match that of a young boy quite well. I too, think that farts are just about the funniest thing on the planet.

Being the mother of boys means that I notice heavy machinery. Cranes and road construction machines of any kind:  I see them. Once, I passed a tractor while driving and said out loud: “LOOK! A tractor!”. I was alone in the car. I also notice garbage trucks, planes, trains and motorcycles. I didn’t before. I did alway notice the ice cream truck but now I see it and say “Oh, damn, it is ringing, that means it is sold out.”

I quite like Bob the Builder. He’s all about teamwork and friendship. He is always really fair and makes sure everything is talked out – any conflict is solved, any lesson learned and any screw-up mended before he tucks his talking machines in at night. (Also, I am pretty sure he is having quite a fuck-fest with Wendy off-camera! Have you seen how they FLIRT? Oh yeah, they’re definitely doing it!!)

And then there is the Lego. There is no end to the Lego. The amount they have, the amount they want, the amount of talk about it, the amount of fighting over it, the amount of time spent building it, the amount of pain it yields to step on one.

Here is a prioritized list of treasures, when you are a 7-year old Danish boy:

1. The Lego catalog.
   Seriously, we get a new one every 2-3 months because he wears them out. He just likes nothing better than to sit and flip through them and imagine all the stuff he’d do with it if he had it, how he would laugh and play. Like grown men do with porn, I imagine.
2. Meat eating plant.
   You are not allowed to touch it for fun or over-feed it. But you can watch how it shuts with a snap and holds captive any little unlucky fly that came by – and it is truly fascinating.
3. Petrified shark’s tooth.
   A shark’s tooth that is as old as the dinosaurs. Awesome.
4. Shrine of fallen out teeth.
   Well. You can read more about that here: The Gap!

Here is my list of treasures, at only a few hours old:

How about that hair? (Oy, imagine if I had a girl! Her hair would be so awesome. Damn.)