It’s here. Winter. So is my depression. 

I do like the days where sparkly crystals of snow reflect the light from a clear blue sky that seems endless; the smell of wood burning and the crunchy sound the snow makes when you walk on it. Being really cold from a snow ball fight until you get inside where George Michael waiting with hot spicy wine and decorating a tree… Wait.. Are we talking about REAL winter??

Like the ones I have??

Oh, those I hate.

Here’s why:

  • The combination of dry air, central heating and cold gives my skin a whitish hue with a greenish tint because it is so dry, itchy and really, really ugly.
  • People look like shit. (Not you of course!) Pale and snot-nosed and scurvy. WHY did my ancestors settle here? WHY?
  • Sickness. As I am writing this I have a two-year old running a fever of 39.9. Poor little guy. Poor me, who will catch it too. I always do.
  • No energy. You get jet lagged from just going outside to get the mail.
  • Pace. Where the natural state would be to hibernate with the bears, we are expected to carry on with our lives at the usual pace – but with the added stress of Christmas and stocking stuffers and candles and presents and… I just want to watch old movies under a blankie and eat marzipan candy. Go away, world.
  • Christmas. I know I’ll get hate-mail if I say anything bad about Christmas, so I won’t – but can I just say that I think it is overrated? Here, the first signs of Christmas are in stores everywhere in the beginning of October, so in reality, we are exposed to reindeer, glitter, 10-course meals made entirely out of pork and bad, cheap chocolate for 3 months before we finally hit the 24th and get it over with.
  • The end is near. Winter signals the end of the year, a small death if you will. It is just slightly depressing to me. Every paper you open is looking back the the major events of the year gone by and although I am pretty happy with my life, I just get depressed by the evident passing of time.
  • Snow. If it is there, it makes impossible to get around and although – granted!! – it is pretty, it only stays pretty for about 10 minutes. Then it becomes a porridge of mud. Slippery mud that wants to kill you.
  • No snow. When there is no snow to reflect the light, it is dark ALL THE TIME, leaving hoards of lemmings and people to throw themselves off tall things because it is so depressing.
So what do people do to survive it? They comfort themselves with social gatherings that are centered around food and alcohol. That’s basically it. And that’s what I’ll do too.
While dreaming about sun and light. And remembering that wonderful weekend I spent with George in that log cabin. (Before he was gay and got a haircut that makes him look like a fetus.)


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